Monday, February 10, 2020

Fun February

Our February has been filled with a lot of cheerleading, as Olivia and her team prepare for the Spring competition season.  She had a little dress rehearsal one afternoon where she was thrilled to show off her skills for the parents and other kids who take at that same gym.















And then she had her first "competition."  It was at NRG and she was SO NERVOUS!  She wanted just mommy to come (with clear instructions that grandparents and friends could go to the other competitions, but this one was like a practice so she just wanted me).  So, early one Saturday morning, we set out for our first cheerleader competition experience. And, it was an experience, lots of glitter and loud music and flashing lights and expensive food/accessories.  But, I think she had fun and her coach said they did their best and it was a good little "practice" before the next 2 competitions which, apparently, he considers the "real competitions."






She said she was nervous, but she loved being on the stage to do her routine/dance







 

They got 4th place out of 8 teams.  I think she was a little disappointed, but happy to get a medal.


 And, this day of cheer WORE. HER. OUT.


Eric remains a little cuddle bug and I just love that he seems happy to be along for the ride.  One of the ways we have fulfilled our "make life easier" resolution is outsourcing dinner.  I found out about a local chef in the area who did meal prep for some neighbors.  I chatted with him and worked out a meal service where he brings 4 completely cooked meals to our house on Sunday afternoon, for about the same price on what I spend for a week's worth of groceries at HEB.  These meals get us through the week.  Let me say, not having to worry about meal planning, shopping, prepping, and cooking is a LIFE CHANGING EVENT for me.  I do really like to cook and I can still do that on the weekend when we have more time.  But, for this stage of life, having healthy, homemade meals that just need to be re-heated is such a gift.  I don't think I can adequately express the level of stress and anxiety this has taken off my plate.

And, specifically, it has meant this little guy and I have more time to read and play in the evenings when big sister is at her various activities.



One of the constant games is construction site.



My dad recently commented on how funny it is that I now know all the major construction vehicles!  Well obviously only because Eric is really into construction vehicles (cement mixers are his fave).

I don't really like it when people refer to Olivia as "girly" or Eric as "all boy" because I don't like to diminish them to one thing.  And, with Eric, I don't think that's been true at all historically.  This kid is anything but rough and tumble.  At this point in his life, he is nothing but sweet, sensitive and reserved.  He went through a phase where he took Olivia's old babydoll everywhere he went, he still says the play kitchen is his favorite toy in the playroom, he spends every morning at my feet asking me to put blush on him as I'm getting dressed, he regularly fights with Olivia to wear her purses and bracelets, and he has a pretend magic wand at the ready with a "Bibbidi-Bobbidi-Boo."  Until very recently, his best friends at school have been the other girls and the teachers.

But I will say that recently he has been into things that I think of as more stereotypical "boy" -- for example the other day he made some gesture with his fingers and asked me if I knew what it was.  For a minute I was terrified he was going to say a gun.   But luckily he said "Its Spiderman!"  (And I guess the gesture was Spiderman shooting his web?!)  I have no idea how he learned that but he was super into Spiderman and when Matt found some cartoon with Spiderman as a little kid, he sat there enthralled watching the entire thing.  In that same vein, he is really into trains, trucks, and much to my dismay, bugs.  He recently asked me for a magnifying glass to look for bugs.  Obvi I'm not going to have any part of that, so I gave him a magnifying glass and turned on A Bug's Life movie for him.  (That being said, the other day Olivia brought home an earth worm from school (SO gross!) which scared the heck out of Eric and for a week he refused to walk past its "habitat" (i.e. plastic box that I made Olivia keep outside) and instead, made one of us carry him while he closed his eyes so he wouldn't have to see the worm.)

And while he is generally happy and sweet, there are definitely moments of anger and frustration.  The saddest is when we can't quite understand what he's trying to say and he gets frustrated.  The other time is when we correct him.  Let me say, this happens VERY RARELY, but if you do correct him, you will get 1 of 2 reactions.  Either he will angrily say "Hmph!" a few times, like he can't believe your audacity to try and correct him.  Or, he will burst into the saddest tears you ever saw and explain to you why he was doing whatever he was doing.  And, to be clear, I am the biggest sucker for this boy in the world.  I have never raised my voice at him or really even spoken to him in a frank tone.  For instance, the other day we were driving and I noticed in the mirror that he was putting a puzzle piece in his mouth.  In the nicest and most calm tone, I told him to just hold it in his hands and not put it in his mouth. He immediately started to cry with huge tears rolling down his sweet little cheeks, explaining in between breaths that he was "just trying to keep it safe."  The whole thing ended with me apologizing to him?

He is also in a weird phase with Olivia where he hits her.  And when I say hits, I mean the most gentle, non-threatening hits in the world.  But, they are completely out of no where and literally only to get attention.  Like he will see her, walk over to her, and hit her.  For no reason.  Completely unprovoked.  At first we were making him apologize and take a break from the situation.  But then we realized it would be better to ignore because it seemed like he was enjoying the attention.  We filled Olivia in on our plan and she begrudgingly agreed (I can't really blame her for not being thrilled with this non-reaction).  So the other day, she just walked into the living room and sat on the couch next to hi, and, of course, he hit her.  I made eye contact with her to let her know I saw what happened and then she and I started talking to each other about something completely different.  Eric came over to me and said "Mommy, I hit Livia!" I ignored him and continued to speak with Olivia.  He repeated over and over again that he hit her, soon in tears because I wasn't reacting.  Finally, I lost that little game of chicken and bent down and said "I know you hit her.  Is that nice?"  To which he clearly responded that it wasn't nice.  And, when asked to make it right, he will immediately run over an apologize.  A few hours later, he hit again. I wasn't in the room but came in when I heard Olivia yell at him.  I walked over to where he was sitting and just looked at him.  He stared at me and then said "Buuuttt....I love you.  I love my mommy.  You're my favorite girl. (insert big smiles at me)."  I kept staring.  He stared back for a few seconds and then said "I did hit Livia.  I will say sorry."

And I want to always remember just how SWEET Eric is to me at this age.  He gives Matt and Olivia bits of sweetness but, to me, it is constant and basically more than I can bear.  He will tell me, completely unprovoked, a million times a day that he "loves me so much," he will randomly starting singing "Mommy is my favorite gurwl in the whole wide world," he will ask me "You please blow me a kiss?" as I'm driving and then he will catch the kiss after I blow it with a huge smile on his face.  And, there is basically not a second of the day when we're together that he doesn't want to be laying on, sitting on, sitting next to, or being held by me.  I just am so in love with this sweet boy.  I tell him all the time how worth the wait he was!

One area where we have been struggling a bit with Eric is his eating, and, more specifically, his non-eating.  This babe would drink a half-gallon of whole milk a day if we let him, but that is the only thing that he will consistently consume.  And, to be clear, he will only consume such milk out of a baby bottle.  Yep.  No amount of begging, pleading, bribing, or tough love will get him to drink milk out of cup.  He is very clear that bottles are for milk and cups are for water.  This is beyond the typical "picky eating" you may be picturing where kids will only eat chicken nuggets or macaroni.  This is he literally does not eat.  Aside from a few carbs/crackers, he really is deficient in any nutrients.  So, after taking some blood (and thereby traumatizing both baby and mamma) we got the hard results and are starting to work with dietitians and therapists to figure out why food is so scary to him and what we can do to convince him to eat a bit.  We had a particularly difficult doctor's appointment with a pediatric gastroenterologist and afterwards, I was rocking him before bed and telling him how I was worried about him and wanted him to start eating so his body would be healthy.  We were closely cuddled up on the rocking chair and he looked at me and, for a second, I thought he would agree.  But then, he put his hands on my cheeks and said "Mommy, if I pull your cheeks will your face come off?"

SOOOO.....not sure he is really grasping the severity of the sitch, but hopefully we can find a solution.

This isn't a new phenomenon with Eric, since he was a baby, he will simply go on hunger strikes and refuse food (or milk in any format other than the one he wants.  At 6 months old, it was no bottle.  And now, at 2.5, it is no cup. (Notice he refused banana too)


This text message with our Amazon deliveries really sums up the 2 very different sides of Eric Dean: on one hand he is 2.5 years old and is already going through PreK workbooks for 4 year olds, but on the other he needs more baby bottles.

One last story about Eric because I feel like this one is just so "Classic Eric."  The other weekend we had a rare weekend with basically no plans.  It was much needed and so it led to lots of cuddles with Eric.  All weekend he had been particularly "lovey" with me, telling me how much he loved me, that I was his "favorite guurrl in the wowld" and basically being my little shadow.  But, that night since Matt was in town, he put Eric to bed.  Eric is never thrilled for Matt to put him down and there were lots of tears, but he settled in and Matt got him down. He woke up about an hour later, which never happens so I ran to check on him.  He told me that he had a bad dream: he and Olivia and DocMcStuffins were in his room playing with 2 puppies and a duck, when all of a sudden a big red truck came into his room and started honking the horn at them.  This story is so dear to me because nothing would make Eric happier than to be with Liv and DocMStuffins and 2 puppies and a duck.  And, nothing would scare Eric more than a big truck honking at him.  I cuddled him in the rocking chair for a bit and he the proceeded to tell me everything Matt did (and did not) do during bedtime.

There is nothing really about poor Matt in this update because he really hasn't been around.  I feel horrible for him and I know he's struggling with all the travel, but we are really done with the worst of it now and I think he will get a few weeks off from traveling.  Plus, they have hired a new employee at work that will hopefully alleviate some of the stress on him.  And, as for me, I have been working on a big case at work that had a huge filing due at the beginning of February.  After working several Fridays and an entire weekend, I planned a last minute spa day.  Seriously, I called Casey about a spa day the next day and she dropped everything, called around to find a spa with 2 massage openings for us, and drove downtown to spend the morning with me.  It was so good for my soul to be with her.  We just had the best day!

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